OH MY FUCKING GOD IT’S HBIC ELIZABETH THE FIRST HER DAD WAS HENRY VIII AND HER MUM WAS ANNE BOLEYN. THAT WOULD MAKE HER TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME EVEN IF SHE WASN’T SUCH A BAMF. SHE MAY HAVE THE BODY OF A WEAK AND FEEBLE WOMAN, BUT SHE HAS THE HEART OF A KING, THE STOMACH OF A CONCRETE ELEPHANT AND THE WINGSPAN OF A GODDAMN ALBATROSS. A TON OF GUYS LIKED IT AND WANTED TO PUT A RING ON IT, BUT LIZ WAS ALL “FUCK NO, BITCHES, I GOT SHIT TO DO.” SHIT LIKE RUNNING A GODDAMN COUNTRY, AND IF YOU WERE DUMB ENOUGH TO GET IN HER WAY SHE’D SEPARATE YOUR HEAD FROM YOUR BODY BEFORE YOU COULD SAY ‘VIRGIN QUEEN’. LIZ I RULED FOR NEARLY HALF A FUCKING CENTURY, SORTED OUT A TON OF RELIGIOUS BULLSHIT AND KICKED SPAIN’S ASS SO HARD SHE CAUSED A STORM THAT FUCKED UP ALL THEIR SHIPS. JUST YOU TRY BEING THAT MUCH OF AN OVERACHIEVER IN A FUCKING CORSET.

OH MY FUCKING GOD IT’S HBIC ELIZABETH THE FIRST

HER DAD WAS HENRY VIII AND HER MUM WAS ANNE BOLEYN. THAT WOULD MAKE HER TOTALLY FUCKING AWESOME EVEN IF SHE WASN’T SUCH A BAMF.

SHE MAY HAVE THE BODY OF A WEAK AND FEEBLE WOMAN, BUT SHE HAS THE HEART OF A KING, THE STOMACH OF A CONCRETE ELEPHANT AND THE WINGSPAN OF A GODDAMN ALBATROSS.

A TON OF GUYS LIKED IT AND WANTED TO PUT A RING ON IT, BUT LIZ WAS ALL “FUCK NO, BITCHES, I GOT SHIT TO DO.” SHIT LIKE RUNNING A GODDAMN COUNTRY, AND IF YOU WERE DUMB ENOUGH TO GET IN HER WAY SHE’D SEPARATE YOUR HEAD FROM YOUR BODY BEFORE YOU COULD SAY ‘VIRGIN QUEEN’.

LIZ I RULED FOR NEARLY HALF A FUCKING CENTURY, SORTED OUT A TON OF RELIGIOUS BULLSHIT AND KICKED SPAIN’S ASS SO HARD SHE CAUSED A STORM THAT FUCKED UP ALL THEIR SHIPS.

JUST YOU TRY BEING THAT MUCH OF AN OVERACHIEVER IN A FUCKING CORSET.

Tagged as: Elizabeth I. extreme advertising.

  1. airess010 reblogged this from bloody-bullseye
  2. harveyspecteresq reblogged this from bat-tits
  3. shalainaofshayeris reblogged this from kon-tinent-el
  4. kon-tinent-el reblogged this from bloody-bullseye
  5. bloody-bullseye reblogged this from bat-tits
  6. bat-tits reblogged this from thejokenobodygets
  7. thejokenobodygets reblogged this from oldrowley
  8. thedovethewolfandthedandelion reblogged this from keepingallmyfingerscrossed
  9. monsieur-narwhalo reblogged this from monsieur-narwhalo
  10. niczka reblogged this from tinywaitress
  11. loserstyles reblogged this from xsingintomymouthx
  12. xsingintomymouthx reblogged this from whiteharts
  13. captaingiggles reblogged this from only-skin-and-bone and added:
    SHE WAS MY FAVORITE IN HISTORY. WHY ARE WE YELLING?
  14. sharperthan reblogged this from dazebras
  15. dazebras reblogged this from zodiacguru2331
  16. emberslash reblogged this from hierophantflaithri
  17. arielimpersonator reblogged this from only-skin-and-bone
  18. only-skin-and-bone reblogged this from zodiacguru2331
  19. lifeafteru reblogged this from zodiacguru2331
  20. waveunfurled reblogged this from myfizzylogic and added:
    I wrote my final paper for my humanities class on this flawless woman. The document was saved as QEI = HBIC.
  21. badwolfwench reblogged this from stutterrific and added:
    Was she really the Virgin Queen though? I believe the Doctor says different :p
  22. stutterrific reblogged this from myfizzylogic
  23. myfizzylogic reblogged this from zodiacguru2331
  24. biteymadlady0303 reblogged this from zodiacguru2331
  25. zodiacguru2331 reblogged this from fairway-frank
  26. alwaysconfusedneverbored reblogged this from queendomoftheconstantwarrior
  27. fudge-muffins reblogged this from queendomoftheconstantwarrior
  28. queendomoftheconstantwarrior reblogged this from b-e-l-a-c-q-u-a and added:
    I WROTE SOMETHING LIKE THIS IN YEAR 9..and was asked to leave the class….see tumblr knows whats real
  29. b-e-l-a-c-q-u-a reblogged this from oldrowley
  30. hierophantflaithri reblogged this from the-life-quixotic
  31. mydreamstoyou reblogged this from smirkingpixiedragons
  32. suited-dolarosa reblogged this from millenniumintothefuture

My picture Baroque and Roll~
Gemma. 24. UK. Professional science nerd, amateur history nerd. Writer. RPer. Tea drinker. Knitter. Admirer of curly-haired oddballs. Slightly goth, mostly bitch. Some things you will see here: history, science, Harry Potter, Doctor Who, Sherlock, Horrible Histories, British sitcoms, feminism, rock music and awful puns. I like posting pictures of handsome men with incredibly fabulous moustaches. I also get creepily enthusiastic about 17th-century European history. The two things are often connected. I laugh at my own jokes, which are many and varied and almost always terrible. Sometimes I like to dress as a pirate. And by sometimes I mean 'at every opportunity'. I also run fuckyeahcharlesthesecond. No regrets, just Charlie.
SLYTHERIN
{ wear }
Currently reading: Frenchman's Creek (Daphne du Maurier); The Escape of Charles II After the Battle of Worcester (Richard Ollard)  monarch(s) being merry

Fly by Dream Themes